It’s time YOU became the center of your own universe | detachment, inner peace, & true confidence
Decentering Everyone and Taking Control of Your Life
You are allowed to outgrow, and evolve people from your past, even the kindest, nicest, most supportive people. If the energy no longer feels aligned, you are not obligated to give other people access to you, and your life, for any longer than you feel comfortable doing so.
Decentering friends is all about removing the codependence, and emotional reliance on people, that no longer serve this current, brand new, upgraded version of you.
It's about taking up space, and being authentically you, even if it doesn't fit in the box that other people have kept you in, in their minds, even if it makes them question if you are who they thought you once were, even if it means outgrowing the version of you that they grew to love, and stepping out of that space.
People who require you to overexplain yourself, were never really your people in the first place.
Centering Yourself and Becoming Self-Obsessed
1. Trusting in yourself above others.
It's about elevating your energy, and trusting in yourself above others.
Every single day starts with, "How do I want to feel today? What kind of day do I want to create for myself? What do I think? What do I want?"
2. Health is the bare minimum.
3. Reject trends, & other people's ideas of what a good time actually means.
Solo dating, quality time, and self-discovery helps you avoid all of that waste of time.
Everything in your life moves in Divine timing.
4. Managing your Energy.
Whether there are arguments in the room, or chaos, you are not absorbing any of that, because your energy, and your intentions, are not an energetic match for it.
Create your own standards, whether it be an app, a situation, a job, or the room you walk into.
5. Decentering your Past.
Stop focusing on the negatives.
Start thinking: How good can it get for me?
What is she doing? How can I get there? What does my future look like? How can I make it better than I've ever imagined?
You just have to step into her energy.
Homework
#1 The DailyQuestions
How would the most ideal version of myself act today?
How do I want to center myself today, or be the most self-obsessed version of myself today?
What kind of day, or week do I want to create for myself, right now?
How do I want to ensure I'm feeling at the end of the day?
What is the outcome I want from the event I'm attending?
Instead of trying to either play out, or discard your fantasies as an Fi user, try just looking at what is this fantasy telling me about the self-work that I need to do.
Our fantasies are meant to tell us something about what's missing.
It's communicating pivotal information.
Who are you in the fantasy?
What's different?
trait.
Don't discount the power of those fantasies as Fi users.
As Fi users, that is the pinnacle of self-awareness, and it's the brilliance of this function.
The same will go for you once you find a goal or an endpoint that you want to get to that your Fi feels very aligned to.
If you can get clear on what your introverted feeling wants, your Te will step up to help you out, so will your Si.
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If you feel like you have so much potential, and yet you simply cannot discipline yourself enough, to get to where you want to get to, consider what might be missing from your extroverted intuition, or your introverted feeling, that isn't locking you in to that action state.
It might just be you not working with your natural energy, and not orienting yourself in the direction that you truly want to go in.
It's a belief, and/or behaviour that keeps you aligned with, in confluence with, experiencing closeness with, and allied to another person, most especially your early caregivers, such as your parents, but that is detrimental to your well-being, and best interests.
Loyalty patterns can take on any form.
There are ancestral loyalty patterns.
Many physical ailments are loyalty patterns.
What unites all of these forms that negative loyalty can take, is that at their root, these are things that do not benefit a person, but they keep a person in a state of allegiance to, and confluence with someone that matters a great deal to them, most especially a parent.
Take the detrimental pattern and imagine changing it for the better, and ask yourself, who would have a problem with me now. What would happen, and why?
Negative loyalty patterns very often fall into the category of self-sabotaging behaviours.
All self-sabotaging behaviours, ultimately serve a self-preserving, self-protecting function.
When we look directly at the fact that we are maintaining a detrimental belief, or continuing a detrimental behaviour, so that we can stay in allegiance, in confluence with a specific person, or group of people. And when we see that doing so keeps us from seeing more of the reality of them, and more of the reality of our relationship with them.
It's only then that we can make a truly conscious choice, about whether to choose to maintain this way of being loyal to them, no matter the consequences of doing so, or whether we are going to choose to adopt a new belief, and a new behaviour despite the consequences we may face by doing so.
Consciously choose consequences.
It is not love to want someone to do something detrimental to themselves so that we can feel loved.
Nor is it love to maintain our own, as well as another person's dysfunction, so as to prove our loyalty to them.
Negative loyalty patterns prevent our progress as individuals.
They prevent our progress as a society, and they prevent our progress as a species.
So, be part of the change today by identifying your negative loyalty patterns, and choose another way to show your loyalty to those you love, and to those who love you.
